The latest

I had a couple of strange dreams the other night.

In one, I was having dinner with my parents, Doc, my dad’s brother whom I have not seen since I was a young teenager, and two people from my office, among other guests, at my parents’ old house in Plano. The kitchen was dark and lit with candles and little brass lanterns, and the table was a large square dark wood table, with placemats and dinnerware in beautiful earth tones and rich reds.

Mom was, not entirely of her own volition but at the suggestion of one of the dinner guests, cooking an authentic Central or South American meal for us. She brought around little tiny shot glasses shaped like the bowls of martini glasses, and gave each of us three of them containing different authentic cocktails. It was a gorgeous presentation.

And then in the center of the table, she set down a small bowl containing the plucked and bloody carcasses of two small birds. She had an exacto knife and said that, in keeping with cultural tradition, she had to perform an augury before the meal. An augury, if you recall from studying classic literature, is a ceremony where a priest or augur examines the entrails of sacrificed birds or other animals in order to predict the future. I was horrified; clearly my mom did not want to do this but felt forced to. I got up from the table and said that I couldn’t take this and had to leave. I went into my dad’s study to lie down on the carpet until the animal sacrifice part was over. I fully expected that someone would come get me when dinner began, but I guess I fell asleep or something because next thing I knew, my mom woke me up. I went into the kitchen and all the guests were gone and the table cleared off.

In another dream, I had to go back to high school for a year, and I went to live with my parents so that I could attend the school in their area. I got up the first morning, looked in the mirror and realized that I was very thin. I was wearing a short skirt that I kept pulling down because I knew Mom wouldn’t let me out of the house wearing it if she realized how short it really was (but it was FASHIONABLE!). I fumbled around trying to get a lunch together and find something to eat for breakfast. The only thing in my parents’ refrigerator that I could find to eat was a tortilla. All their cheeses and meats were left unwrapped and sitting out on the shelf, drying out and crusting over.

Whoever was driving me to school arrived, and I had to get down the stairs to the basement/garage, but the stairs were unbelievably steep and completely covered with knickknacks of every sort. I was afraid I’d step on something or fall. Somehow I made it downstairs and to school.

The school seemed to only have valet parking. The building itself, both inside and out, was made of a beautiful dark mahogany wood, with little brass lanterns everywhere. It looked like a law office or something. I couldn’t figure out which area of the building my first class was in, since things were marked very poorly. I ended up late to the first class. Lunch was my second period of the day, and I was shocked to realize that they expected me to eat lunch at 10 in the morning. I didn’t know what to do with the lunch I’d brought, as it appeared to be a plastic grocery sack full of frozen vegetables. One of my classmates told me that I could store it in the large freezer in the lunchroom, as everyone had their own space there.

I think that I decided I didn’t want to go to school anymore, because part way through the day I went into a storage area in one of the hallways, opened a large sliding door, and fetched my mahogany ladder with brass pins. Someone had dismantled it for storage, so I had to put it back together. I needed the ladder in order to get my car keys. Outside the school, in the valet parking area, was an enormous magazine rack, the height of the school. It contained giant magazines, and all the car keys were hung at the very top. This is why I needed the ladder. Kids without ladders often made a game of trying to sneak past the valets and climb the rack to get their own keys. The valets were more like police officers, actually; you definitely were not supposed to do this.

I was on the front lawn of the school and I watched as Valerie came out, looked around sneakily for valets, and began to scale the magazine rack. But she wasn’t going after car keys; she simply wanted a copy of Fortune magazine because her picture was on the cover! Sadly, she got caught by the valet cops and handcuffed. And that’s when I woke up.

In yet another dream, I dreamed that Jamie spoke his first word: “probably.” I looked at him and said, “Did you just say something?” He put his hands on my face, pulled me in close like he does when he is giving a kiss, and said, “Pwobabwy, mommy!”

May 26

How do two sick parents manage to care for a demanding 6 month old, all without getting him sick too?! It’s a daunting task. I miss living near family sometimes 🙁 Thanks to Auntie Rachel for pitching in to help us get some rest today.
Doc and I have been sick for the past week or so, he with a nasty head and chest cold, and me with some sort of stomach virus. We’re both feeling better now, him moreso than me. But it was pretty tough for a while. I sure miss my mom. I’m thinking more and more lately about packing up and moving to live closer to them. It would be crazy to leave a good job and try to sell a house, considering the current state of the economy. But what once seemed like a far off “some day” kind of dreamy possibility, now seems much more real.

May 24

I feel like crap. Exhausted from baby. Can’t sleep. Can’t eat. But I’m trying SO hard…
The weekend consisted of nausea, vomiting, dehydration, exhaustion, inability to eat, inability to sleep when I did get a chance, trying to entertain the baby when I didn’t have any energy reserves, and trying to prevent him from getting Doc’s cold. Unfortunately, he does seem to have an occasional low grade fever and a little cough now, but nothing too major.

May 22

I hate hate HATE dealing with the medical insurance industry.
We are about to engage in battle with Blue Cross in an attempt to get them to cover Jamie’s Nutramigen AA formula, which is unbelievably expensive. The cheapest we’ve been able to find it will cost us about $25-$35 per DAY. It is a medical necessity due to his food sensitivities, and some states do require insurance companies to cover elemental formulas for babies with severe allergies. Texas is, of course, not one of them. Wish us luck.

May 21

I am glad my son is feeling lots better most of the time, but wishes that he wouldn’t fight sleep with every fiber of his being.
He just hates going to sleep. He hates staying asleep. And he’s really good at not sleeping for very long at a stretch. This is getting so tiring.

May 18

I am trapped beneath a sleeping baby in my office…
Jamie came to visit me for a couple of hours while Doc went to a doctor appointment. It was nice.

May 17

I was born in Arizona, moved to Babylonia.
We went with Rich and  Angela to the King Tut exhibit at the Dallas Museum of Art. It was closing weekend, and crowded beyond belief. The exhibit was really neat, and we enjoyed the company and subsequent dinner at Ziziki’s.

May 12

I miss my mom already, but look forward to days of smooth sailing. We all deserve it.
Mom left for home this morning. I miss her a lot. Sadly, the ‘smooth sailing’ part hasn’t quite happened yet, but we’re working on it.

May 10

I am confused by the new movie “Rise of the Lichens.”
Yes, I know it’s “lycans.” I just like to imagine a film about strange symbiotic plant-animals rebelling against their oppressors.


  1. Carrie

    Have I told you that my favorite article on parenting ever is the one that said that babies who don’t like or need much sleep have higher levels of intelligence?

    I love vivid, movie like, epic dreams. I like that both of your dreams had lanterns in them. There’s a guiding light in there somewhere.

  2. Valerie

    I’m so glad someone has finally realized my true potential as a future cover model for Fortune magazine! I am the apotheosis (isn’t that a cool word? had to look it up and make sure it fit moi) of the corporate super star! Next mag cover–Handy Man.

    Hope you all are on the mend. Hugs to all.

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